happy new yr for all...

2006 goin to be over in couple of hours.

hah............ hard to believe a year just pass so fast, mayb too slow for me, differ view for differ person, coz 2006 is the worst yr of me eva experienced. so much have happened, mostly bad things, and really.........hope nth worse than this in coming yr. is just like a dream, so much of unbelievables, 1st coming to perth, a place i neva even think of coming, then i did. another great change is lymphoma, although is not all ova, and when looking back the path i have gone through, still don believe how i actually manage to come through all these, as i said is just like a dream, a very long dream.

and today, new year's eve.........

so boring ah, stay at home writting blog, haha, yea, seems meaningless to me......

anyway, the real meaning is lives betta, whole new yr and whole new life. everything comes in cycle, theres end and theres beginning, and it will begin agen and ends agen, so my new yr's hope.........:

1. of coz the most important thing, hope everyone is healthy and contented

2. peace but full of excitements

3. earn more money$$$

4. improvements in everything

5. for the girls, become prettier, and for the guys, become much handsome

6. happily ever after

always ask for more, but just make 6 wishes at the moment. mayb last yr din make wishes thats y this yr is full of disasters.

hope all wishes will come true.

人生不如意之事十常八九...

so long haven been updating this space, dunno wut to write anymore.

and TEE result finally out, as i expected, no gd, a bit disappoint, but since i have prepared for that. remember last time when PMR results were out, i was crying, though that time i get betta result than this time, and i cried, mayb my expectation was too high last time....no, don get it, that time i was going to laugh but end up crying, how embarrasing, very complicated emotion. one thing i learn now is to accept the fact, and well...

i know i m going to get no gd, din cry, since i have other ways, uni seems too high for me now, i have climb half way, but decided to take a rest, mayb is betta, coz i don wan to end up falling, take some time to think wut i really wan to do.

i was too lucky for this case, even though being sick, haha, get some advantage too, far too gd for me, more than fair (shud i thank for being sick?). but.......... i don wan anyone to think that i getting such results is becoz i m sick, no matter wut, i know myself getting lazy, slack, and don concentrate much. mayb there is no one to blame on, an accident? haha, i dunno. normally when things goes wrong and no one to blame on, i like to blame myself.

is my fault to not take care myself properly, and end up being sick, then missing school lessons, and finally get bad results in TEE.

thats y sometimes i hate myself, but then i realise, becoz i don like myself, so i din wan to make myself betta, then i hate agen, and i torture myself (haha, not so serious of coz), after all these happens, i learnt i need to love myself b4 anything else.

...........cant believe i m writting all these........

 

someone else get mad today abt the reults, the someone will nvr c this so i m safe to bitch behind his back (ahh, i have give a clue is a guy, he wont know anyway). i cant help him and dunno how to help, but since now he is not mad anymore then fine. he shuda be disappoint and shame himself instead of mad at ppl disappoint at him, anyway i don have rights to scold him, i shud feel disapoint at myself too.

 

but afterall is ova, cant do anything to change the results, just give some times to think agen and agen...

 

chrismas in summer

christmas is near....everyday, tv, shopping complex, everywhere can hear christmas songs,

 "u betta watch out.....santa claus is coming to town....",

every yr same songs, but santa nvr did arrive in town, so they nvr change the songs till santa here.

though listen to it everyday, still don really know how to sing, don even know the song name, i m outdated.

pity australian have to pass christmas in summer, santa have to wear T-shirt and hot pants if he wants to come aus. too bad santa say:" i would need to shave my beard too!" then santa arrive that time no one would recognise him at all, the australian would only think he is some other old man, and pass by him without even saying hi. santa would be so disappoint if that happen, so he thought abt it and decide not to have vacation in aus, and so evry yr australian sing "santa claus is coming to town", hoping santa will come one day, and they know santa will nvr come too, so they hire few fat guys to pretend santa, and thats y christmas still exist in aus till today. 

 

the flies r joing the christmas party too. this is really one of the unexplain in perth (not sure if it happen to whole aus), winter that time all the flies gone, even no flies on rubbish, whole perth is so peace... when summer here, they r back, scary thing is so much of them, from nowhere. this yr summer is bit ok, last yr summer, wah.... flies everywhere, they not only on rubbish and food, they attack human! australia flies basically is harmless, they r cleaner but very much bigger, they r slow, but they r smart.. the flies will nvr gone in summer, no matter how much we hit. 1 down 50 more to go (abit exagerate), very reproductive, wut is even worse is they attck ppl face, c how smart they r, they go for face, nvm if is other body parts, but they pick face!! how important is our face!!

dunno heard from dunno who abt how australian got their accent, becoz the flies is flying all ova the face, so aussie have to talk quick and keep their mouth as close as possible (dunno if its true, but some aussie do talk in this way)  

rest in peace.. my frens and my enemies......

yesterday is a day worth celebrating!! 3 months of coughing, 6 months of treatments, 12 chemos, more than 10 times of vommiting in hospital, feeling nausea every 2 weeks............. finally...........OVER!!!! but anyways, one more pet scanning then if nth happens, i m no more the hodgkin lymphoma patient, i m no more a cancer patient, i m free of anymore suffering, i m....i m.... i m....."healthy" again .....haha.

phew, and finally the PICC line is taken out, my right arm is free now, no more wrapping when showering, i can swim now, i don care abt carrying heavy stuffs now (but i wouldnt wan to carry anyway).

but still dunno if "u" r dead yet, i hope "u" did, "u" r the enemies that i will nvr forget and FORGIVE! nvr eva come back again, my left lung is not ur territory anymore (and no other parts in my body). its been a long time but yet seems very short, the death of my comrades, millions of them, rest in peace....... sorry for sacrificing "u guys" especially my hair, but don worry is growing back, now.....just have to wear hat.

most importantly, thx to all my family and frens, and to all staffs in haematology department, millions of appreaciation for the supporting and helping during these 6months, its tough, but i have done it so far so gd, hehe. something that just makes me disappoint is the waste of 6 months studying, din pay much attention, and haizz, dunno wut to do now........

so yes, always remember 12 dec 2006, the year of 2006, dunno wuts wrong wif this yr, just the worst yr i have ever experienced, and wuts more this kind of shitzz happen in my last yr in highschool, such an important yr, @#$%$#^*&@#%$^%##@%^#$&%*%!!!!! 

now just cross my finger, 4th jan next yr, PET scan !! hope "U" r dead, no more in my body, flush down the toilet and send to make fertilisers, absorb by vegetables and eaten by someonelse (NOT ME!) so rest in peace, forever......